For Women's Eyes Only

WARNING: If there are any men in my vast blog audience, I advise you to stop reading here. The following topic will not interest you and might give you more info than you ever really wanted to know.

You may have heard of good/bad hair days, good/bad makeup days, good/bad wardrobe days, etc. In the last ten days I experienced two new type of days. I'll begin with the good...I had a "Good Bra Day".

I bought a new bra the other day. I purchased it at a place called "Braserie Dearie", whose sole commodity is undergarments. I had a professional bra fitting and the bra I got fits perfectly. Since wearing it, I feel taller and more confident. I remember an episode of the TV series "Designing Women" where one of the characters, an eccentric older woman whose eccentricities were ascribed to a "circulatory problem", was having a great day where all her synapses were firing. She credited this to her new push-up bra, which was increasing her circulation. I felt that way today. It's been one of my most productive days in months!

Now, the bad...I had a "Bad Underwear Day" about a week ago. And not your normal creeping or twisting underwear problem. Allow me to explain.

I was getting dressed for work and only had one pair of clean underwear in the drawer. They were a pair with high cut legs, that I don't really like much and only wear when they're the only drawers in the drawer. I put them on and found they were more uncomfortable than usual; but they were the only clean ones I had so I figured I'd just have to suffer for the day. It wasn't until I was pulling up my pantyhose that I realized the source of the discomfort...the crotch was at my hip. I'd put them on not backwards, not inside out, but sideways? Truly this was one for the books. Or at least my blog!

So, am the only one or can anyone else relate?

I Went to a Gardner Party

Introduction: For those of you unfamiliar with the Ricky Nelson song, ask your parents, or check here for original lyrics. I went to a Gardner Party to fellowship with all my friends; a chance to share our "one good things" and sing the psalms again.

When I got to the Gardner Party, Malachi wouldn't come. He just eyed me warily, and went on sucking his thumb.

CHORUS:

But it's all right now, I learned my lesson you bet. Don't sit next to Malachi unless you want your lap wet.

People came from Lawrence Park. Everyone was there. Olympia brought her "My Little Pony". There was whinnying in the air.

And over in the corner, Lilly laughed with Grandpa B. Josh & Adiel's little darling is a sight to see.

CHORUS

Elijah and Patty are engaged. Wedding plans are being made. Will the cake topper be Sponge Bob or a traditional floral cascade?

Tom and Elizabeth spoke of swordplay. Brad looked amazed. Sharp Oriental weapons make me want to run away.

CHORUS

If you get a chance to attend a Gardner Party, you'll experience lots of love and fun. But if Malachi picks up a glass I suggest you run.

Avant Garde

For those of you who don't know, I'm still working on my Bachelor's degree. Needing some Arts credits (and a much needed easy class), last semester I took "Evolution of Jazz". I was already a fan of jazz music before I took the class, but the class made me appreciate it more. I was exposed to different styles and artist who I might never have considered before. It was a rewarding class, and not just because I got an "A-".

One jazz style I'd never heard of before was something called "Avant Garde Jazz" or "Free Jazz". It came about during the 60's, when everyone was rebelling against the traditional. As described by professionals:

"The avant garde challenged the listener by allowing the musician to choose his own musical path rather than follow the traditional approaches to which jazz musicians had previously adhered. All aspects of the music were at the discretion of the improviser. The music often transcended recognizable pitches and musical shapes, allowing moans, shrieks, and cries to convey the energy and emotional discourse of the individual musician. (www.vervemusicgroup.com)

Sounds nice, huh? My own amateur description would be that each musician plays whatever is in his head at the time, disregarding any thoughts of harmony, chord progression, or beat. In other words, NOISE.

The sad thing is that those musicians one is able to pick out among the cacophony are quite skilled, but their talent is lost amidst the racket.

I'm to be conformed to the image of Christ, and when I'm in rebellion, my life is discordant, like free jazz. I'm out of harmony, and although I might be living a "pretty song", it gets lost with all the others who are playing over me.

The independence and individualism prized and encouraged by our culture is disturbing to our spirits, like a constant blare of a horn or siren. It agitates and irritates, like fingernails on a chalkboard. There's no musicality to it.

In Corinthians, Paul says "For the body is not one member, but many." And an orchestra, band, quartet, etc is not one instrument, but many following a musical score. Even when they improvise, band members complement the soloist, not work against him.

The musical style might be different - classical, jazz, rock and even Country & Western, but there is a tonal quality to it(well maybe not as much to C&W).

I've got a great composer, arranger and conductor in God. He's able to make beautiful music using me and my short, stubby spiritual fingers in His band of players as long as I read His score and follow His baton.

I'm Fenced In

...and loving it. I had the fence in my backyard replaced last week. The previous fence was about 40-50 years old, rusted through in spots, and only encompassed 2 of the 3 sides of my backyard. Therefore, I was unable to let the dogs roam free. I would put them on a long tie out cable, but they would get tangled up (especially around my ankles), knock things over (quite often ME), and just be inconvenienced and an inconvenience.

With this new fence, they are discovering corners of the yard they've never sniffed (and other unmentionable practices) before. And they aren't knocking over the table and chairs anymore. This used to be a big problem, especially when I was sitting in said chair.

Though it seems a contridiction in terms, this fence has allowed all of us freedom we didn't have before.

Plumbing Problems

It's been over 2 months since my last post. But I have a legitimate reason, HONEST! I've had plumbing problems. All these blog ideas have been plugged up in my brain but unable to work their way down to my fingers and keyboard. But tonight, I decided to tackle this DIY project. I'm sitting here with my mental Liquid Plumber (a large Diet Coke) and plunging my brain, pushing the thoughts through to the screen. Things are draining a bit slowly, but they are draining. It might be a few days before things are flowing freely, though. Thanks for your patience!