Saturday, December 09, 2006

The Dark Side of Me

There is no doubt many of women's (and men's) mood swings can be atributed to hormonal shifts. And many a temper tantrum has been blamed on them, as well.

But I wonder, are they the cause, or are do the chemical imbalances just bring to light the evil that is already lurking inside of me?

Today has been such a day for me and the ugliness that surfaced frightens me. Is this something that will go away once my body readjusts itself, or is this just one more battle I need to fight?

I'm battle-weary enough, as it is. I don't want to have to fight on one more front.

As I was reading in Psalms today, I came upon this verse in Psalm 18 - "For by You I can run upon a troop; and by my God I can leap over a wall". But what am I supposed to do when I don't want to leap over any walls? What am I supposed to do when all I want to do is rest in peace?

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